Audrey Mestre

August 11, 1974 - October 12th, 2002
This web page is in memory of our beloved Audrey Mestre, a great freediver and an even greater person...
Audrey, you will always be in our thoughts and in our hearts.
We love you!

October 12, 2024

I would have to invent a special calendar, just for you, just to mark each day with a little heart your absence, to mark when I dream of you, when I feel your presence. A calendar just for us.

A calendar that would represent my pain, that of a mother without her daughter. Without this love that we are normally supposed to experience day after day, throughout the days, weeks, months, years. A calendar that would represent nothing but pure happiness.

Instead, my calendar, the one that accompanies me during each new year, generates anxiety in me. I turn the pages and the fateful dates that concern you appear.

The anniversary of your birth, which should fill me with joy, I will never regret having suffered for your birth, but you are no longer here so that we can congratulate you on that day, dad, me and all those who knew you, loved you, you and those who still remember you. The anniversary of your wedding, but of this fleeting happiness only the photos and the unconditional love of Pipin, your husband with whom we maintain an affectionate relationship, remain.

The anniversary of your departure to a better world, but for us it is the worst of all. Every year this absence that weighs on us, that tears us apart, that eats away at us a little more marks a little more. It is something that is difficult to live with, but also difficult to have to pretend that everything is fine when I still want so much to cry my anguish, my pain, my sorrow. I want to hold you in my arms, tell you that I love you, that you are everything to me, but when in a dream I close my arms around you, it is only emptiness.Waking up is even more difficult.

Difficult days are coming for us, then calm will come, resignation until the next date that will be Christmas. I speak of my state of mind as we speak of the sea "the calm after the storm".

I love you darling and that is an understatement.

Your mom